Fear is not from God. God has not given you a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. When you are afraid, bow in reverential worship before the God of all creation. He is big enough to take care of any dangerous situation!
“the thinking that guides your intelligence is much more important than how much intelligence you have”
― David J. Schwartz,
From my understanding, self sabotage is the interference that we as individuals allow that ultimately keep us from our personal goals. A great example of this is procrastination.
I’m not really sure why I do it or when I started doing it, but I am aware that I self-sabotage. They say self- reflection is the key to moving forward so here I am. I know that I am smart, full of energy and ideas, but sometimes I have trouble starting and/or finishing things. I remember when I was younger I use to say that I was scared of my own success. Someone interpreted that I was afraid of failure and I didn’t see it then as being afraid of failure but as a 27 year old woman, I get what they mean now.
The NO JUDGEMENT ZONE:
Please and thank you. 🙂
So I am fully aware of this box that I created for myself and as much as I could blame it on a lot of exterior factors such as various traumas, parenting style of my parents , and other things, I think it’s about time for me to build a habit getting past that. I am starting to feel the hassle that has been created through my self sabotaging behavior.
How do I self sabotage?
For me I think procrastination is probably my biggest issue. When it comes to someone having an expectation of me, as it pertains usually to my own goal, I tend to sway away from it.
I am a graduate student and a full-time employee. Because of this my professors work with me to make sure that we utilize other ways of getting credit that I would otherwise get had I been able to attend class in full. My professor only wanted me to write a reflection email to show that I am still following along with the readings. Sounds easy right? Idiot proof? Yea, but let me tell you that it was so hard for me to write one until she emailed me and asked me where they were. We have had about 5 classes go by.
But why did I do that? To be honest I really believe the reason why I procrastinated the way I did is because I will be finished with my master’s in December. At least I’m planning to be, and the truth is, I’m terrified. I’ve always wanted to get my master’s. It was a dream of mine in undergrad but I never thought any school would accept me because I of my g.p.a. Now that I’m almost done, I’m dragging my feet out of fear of what can come out of it.
The key phrase is “what can come out of it?”
So again, even years later, the question of whether that is fear of success or failure, or a constant thought of not being deserving suspended in mid air.
As some of you know I attend Word of Faith in Southfield, MI. This past weekend, Pastor Michelle Ferguson had the stage. She preached a sermon called ” A Change of Heart”. She mentioned a few things/ stories that I felt were relevant to how I been feeling lately.
God can change the circumstances around you but it’s up to you to make it possible for what you want, but it’s up to you to determine what you will accept from God. She used a great example with a kitchen tool that resembled a strainer. The strainer wasn’t that big but it represented what she was willing to allow to be filtered through her life. She mentioned that when she had meet her husband, she didn’t feel that he could genuinely love her for who she was. I other words at the time because of what she believed about herself, she couldn’t imagine being worthy of something so big.
I could totally relate to this. There were things externally throughout my life that have been written on my heart that have hindered me in different ways, but ultimately it is up to me to be the keeper of my heart.
The inspiration of this particular post is rooted in wanting that change to that I can receive in this year of fabulous outpouring. I need to believe bigger and start to believe more about what God has said to me in regards to who I am.
He has definitely always showed me that he will deliver me and open doors for me. I just need to believe for all the things I want to come through those doors and that it is mine.
Self sabotage is a tool from an enemy, a form of bondage, that keeps us from being where God wants to be. It keeps us from reaching the people he wants us to reach, and it prohibits us from bringing glory to God and making his name great.
So today, I ask that you reflect if you are a procrastinator or someone who engages in self sabotage and really ask yourself why you feel that you don’t deserve it?
Victory is yours!
There is a saying that we look at life through either two lenses, love or fear. Depending on the situation you may utilize one or the other, or even both.
So, in my relationship I have learned to internationally see things through the lenses of love. Why? Because things happen, offenses occur, things get said or not said, and well sometimes you are just plain irritated with your significant other.. I intentionally see the best in my boyfriend because I trust him and I love him. I truly believe we are made for one another.
This is something I do intentionally because it’s really easy to go overboard in taking something out of context. My boyfriend and I are doing fine :), and these are just thoughts. Loving someone is intentional, it’s not a feeling. So within that capacity, you have to be intentional, especially if you want it to work in the long run.
When Brandon thinks of me I always want him to feel supported, appreciated for who he is, trusted, and loved. I want him to always know that our relationship is a safe place and that he is entitled to make mistakes as he continues on his personal journey within our relationship.
I think it’s easy to forget about love in terms of action. I think we get caught up in the butterflies, the mushy conversations, and all of the cute stuff that we forget loving someone has his flip side
As y’all can probably tell, I’m in love…
Good Afternoon and Happy Friday!
So yesterday, I noticed that I had been feeling a little discontent. Now that I think about it, it’s probably because I have a lot of long term goals but not many short. So for me everything seems very far away. My actual graduation ceremony is in 2018 because my institution is small and only does one ceremony a year. I’m not sure when my debt will be gone although I am shooting for the end of this year also. Now I won’t go into detail about where my discontentment can lie at times but I will say that I acknowledge that I have some discontentment in me that I wish to not let bother me any longer.
Being discontent yesterday made me lose out on the day I was living in. I was literally on the verge of tears about my future. FOR NOTHING! Are there things I want? Heck yes! Are there times I wish I could have them sooner. YEP! But in thinking so much about the future I ruined the time to truly just be happy in the moment I was in. It wasn’t a bad moment after all.
So admitting you have an issue I hear is the first step. Now I need to get to the source of where that discontentment comes from.
In the meantime looking up bible verses about being content.
Philippians 4:11-13 ESV /
Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
Perfect work is made in patience.. Clearly I should know this already.
Enjoy the scripture!!
1 Timothy 6:6 ESV /
Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment,
Uh, here we go because not minding your own business is the quickest way to become discontent.. lol
1 Thessalonians 4:11 ESV /
And to aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we instructed you,
Psalm 37:4 ESV /
Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.p
Romans 4:19-23King James Version (KJV)
19 And being not weak in faith, he considered not his own body now dead, when he was about an hundred years old, neither yet the deadness of Sarah’s womb:
20 He staggered not at the promise of God through unbelief; but was strong in faith, giving glory to God;
21 And being fully persuaded that, what he had promised, he was able also to perform.
22 And therefore it was imputed to him for righteousness.
23 Now it was not written for his sake alone, that it was imputed to him;
Abraham didn’t focus on his own impotence and say, “It’s hopeless. This hundred-year-old body could never father a child.” Nor did he survey Sarah’s decades of infertility and give up. He didn’t tiptoe around God’s promise asking cautiously skeptical questions. He plunged into the promise and came up strong, ready for God, sure that God would make good on what he had said. That’s why it is said, “Abraham was declared fit before God by trusting God to set him right.” But it’s not just Abraham; it’s also us! The same thing gets said about us when we embrace and believe the One who brought Jesus to life when the conditions were equally hopeless. The sacrificed Jesus made us fit for God, set us right with God.
Have you ever had the feeling that you were just so beautiful after waking up? So this morning I’m clearly on a natural high. I feel as pretty as a button. My skin has a slight glow, and I just feel at peace. I didn’t have those overbearing thoughts this morning either. It was smooth. Lauren was cooperative during breakfast and wasn’t too loud this morning.
Last night I fell asleep listening to Pastor Andre Butler of Word of Faith International Christian Center, the church I attend. The message was about doing life together with other Christians. When I woke up in the middle of the night, it was on a different sermon that I turned off to preserve my battery for this morning.
Anyway, I feel good this morning and I hope you do too!
HAPPY THURSDAY, WE ALMOST THERE!